I often wonder, how I am perceived by strangers I meet for the first time. What do they see when they first look at me? Once upon a time, I believed they looked at my glasses and that was it. I was “four-eyes” and that was all I was (kids are so cruel so often), even to myself.
Now, in the mirror and in my head, I am that stylish woman with great clothing sense and killer frames. But still I wonder, sometimes, how do they, how do you, see me?
I'm fat, you see and a classic apple body type. I've got a belly, and I've been asked if I was pregnant a few times, when I really, really wasn’t (it was almost a relief to be pregnant, then I could embrace my belly without worry). What do people see when they look at me? Do they see only the fat, the belly, or do they not see it at all, and only see the powerful and confident woman I am?
Two things stem from this.
The first is that it's actually kind of sad if all they do see is “fat”. I'm beautiful, you see. I look wonderful, I feel wonderful, and so I am beautiful. I look at you, and whatever you think may be your own personal flaws, I see that you are beautiful as well. If you can't see the beauty in the people around you, maybe you can't see the beauty in yourself either.
I ran across this yesterday. I went for lunch with my husband, brother and his girlfriend to a nice restraunt for my birthday. Husband and I were dressed in full, smart buiness attire. The waiter who served us was tall, thin, with olive skin and thought himself hansom. But he wouldn't look at me. Not once, did he look me in they eye; when he took my drink order, when he took my food order, when he presented the food, when I asked for a desert menu (it was my birthday ^_^), when I asked for the bill. That's four or five interactions where his gaze kept slipping past mine and off into space. Was I too fat for him to look at? Perhaps he just didn't like women who take control of a table.
The second thing is that I don't care what you think. I may wonder from time to time, like now, or like about the waiter above, what it is you think of me. But in the end, I don't care. The only person's opinion is truly, really important is my own.
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4 chic comments:
happy belated birthday!
and i see you as a stylish woman :)
Thanks Irina ^_^
Gosh, that waiter was just rude!
I think that kind of thing happens to everyone and it's sad that women, particularly, are so often judged purely on their looks and how they measure up to a model "ideal"
I think style is about recognising what makes you an individual and I think you have that in spades.
Happy belated birthday by the way!
Heya Retro Chic, thanks for stopping by.
It does happen to everyone, but as I was dressed to the nines, the waiter had no reason to fault me on my style. It hasn't stopped me going back though, and meeting his eye and smiling.
Thanks for the lovely compliment and thanks for the birthday wishes ^_^
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